Character: Capt Handbanana
Caldari
Civire
-1.03
Last Active:
2 days ago
Birthday:
Jun 19, 2010 (15 years old)
Next Birthday:
Jun 19, 2026 (282 days remaining)
Corporation: Blood Alcohol Content
Alliance: T O P S H E L F

Combat Metrics

Kills
7,392
Losses
581
Efficiency
92.7%
Danger Ratio
92.7%

ISK Metrics

ISK Killed
6742.14B ISK
ISK Lost
83.61B ISK
ISK Efficiency
98.8%
ISK Balance
6658.53B ISK

Solo Activity

Solo Kills
235
Solo Losses
174
Solo Kill Ratio
3.2%
Solo Efficiency
57.5%

Other Metrics

NPC Losses
26
NPC Loss Ratio
4.5
Avg. Kills/Day
1.3
Activity
Very High

Character Biography

Tonight....You.

Very well, where do I begin? My father was a relentlessly self-improving boulangerie owner from Belgium with low grade narcolepsy and a penchant for buggery. My mother was a fifteen year old French prostitute named Chloe with webbed feet.

My father would womanize, he would drink, he would make outrageous claims like he invented the question mark. Some times he would accuse chestnuts of being lazy, the sort of general malaise that only the genius possess and the insane lament.

My childhood was typical, summers in Rangoon, luge lessons. In the spring we'd make meat helmets. When I was insolent I was placed in a burlap bag and beaten with reeds, pretty standard really.

At the age of 12 I received my first scribe.

At the age of fourteen, a Zoroastrian named Vilma ritualistically shaved my testicles. There really is nothing like a shorn scrotum, it's breathtaking, I suggest you try it.




Kill: Smkazer (Vargur)
[02:20:51] Smkaze > trash game
[02:21:24] Capt Handbanana > can i have your stuff?
[02:21:54] Smkaze > Hope this game will close down soon

Kill: Redeovg (Panther)

Stats (90d)